Beautiful Virgin Islands

Saturday, Aug 01, 2026

Boris Johnson studied the classics at Oxford but now seeks (and needs!) a spokesman to rein in his flailing tongue

Boris Johnson studied the classics at Oxford but now seeks (and needs!) a spokesman to rein in his flailing tongue

A job listing for the role of prime minister’s spokesperson has been released, but what will the new role mean for the political discourse in Britain and is it actually an insurance policy to protect BoJo from himself?
Boris Johnson was born in New York. And now he’s paying tribute to the Stars and Stripes by adopting a cult feature of the American political sphere – the high-profile spokesperson who will front White House-style televised daily press briefings.

It’s a role that’s never previously existed in Britain, as the government has the non-political civil service at its beck and call. Currently they hold twice daily briefings known as ‘the lobby’, where they speak to journalists and answer questions.

There’s no doubt that this practice has the air of a colonial country club, with only the right faces and names fitting in. That came across loudly during the Covid-19 crisis when the political reporters seemed to have all agreed to not ask anything searching of the government – the quid pro quo for their acquiescence is anyone’s guess. Their questioning during the coronavirus press conferences was the equivalent of tickling a teddy bear.

So the new spokesperson will hopefully shake up that cosy love-in of backroom dealings.

Though only their afternoon briefing will be shown on TV daily, the morning session will continue to be held in private with journalists.

The material difference is the spokesperson will be a member of the Conservative Party.

They will work for the prime minister and will sacrifice any neutrality. So they will no longer be a faceless figure existing only in print as the ‘prime minister’s official spokesman’.

They will be front and centre, out there at the coalface, dodging the bullets – in return, their salary is expected to be around £100,000. That shows how much faith Boris is placing in this individual to steer his communications. Members of Parliament in the House of Commons only make £81,932.

The brief is encapsulated as to “communicate with the nation on behalf of the prime minister” and the successful candidate is expected to have “excellent risk management and crisis communication skills.”

That should really be ‘super-human crisis communication skills’. Boris is the man who vowed: “I’d rather be dead in a ditch than ask for Brexit delay.” And what did he ask for a few months later? Exactly.

Other smash hits from BoJo’s cannon of confusion include: “Life expectancy in Africa has risen astonishingly as that country has entered the global economic system,” and his advice to Libya on how to rebuild from a brutal civil war: “They have got a brilliant vision to turn Sirte into the next Dubai. The only thing they have got to do is clear the dead bodies away.”

There was also his tone-deaf decision to recite Rudyard Kipling’s Mandalay in a sacred temple in Burma – a poem laced with colonial bile. He was only stopped by Britain’s visibly uncomfortable ambassador who interjected: “No, not appropriate.”

Then he was given a dressing room captured by the BBC after visiting a Sikh temple in Bristol, unaware of the religion’s rejection of alcohol, Boris blundered on about Brexit: “I hope I’m not embarrassing anybody here by saying that whenever we go to India – Mumbai or to Delhi – we have to bring clinking. We have to bring Johnnie Walker, we have to bring whisky. There is a duty of 150 per cent in India on imports of Scotch whisky. So we have to bring it in duty free for our relatives.”

Johnson, then foreign secretary, was criticised for making misleading statements when Iran arrested dual national Nazanin Zaghari-Ratcliffe accusing her of being a threat to the regime. She and her family maintain she was only there on holiday, but Boris said that in fact she had been “training journalists,” but had to concede shortly afterwards his assertion was “my mistake.”

Being mistaken or lying is something Boris has dabbled in all throughout his career. He was sacked by the Times in 1988 for writing a front-page story that contained a quote from his godfather, British historian Colin Lucas. But it was completely fabricated and his godfather complained.

Then in 2004, he lost a junior political role after declaring: “I have not had an affair with Petronella (Wyatt). It is complete balderdash.” However, it transpired he had – and Ms Wyatt even had an abortion as a result of their relationship.

So eating soup with chopsticks might be easier than having to speak on behalf of a man who has a natural talent for saying the wrong thing.

The other side of the coin is that possibly those around Boris have realised he’s a liability. Now as PM, he probably couldn’t survive a really high-profile slip of the tongue and his handlers likely think prevention is better than cure. So if he doesn’t talk, he can’t hang himself – and by default, them too.

Some critics, mainly on the other side of the political spectrum, have raised concerns that the new spokesperson will “unbalance the political discourse.” But that seems a moot point. Instead of the civil service filtering things, aren’t we better just to hear the full story?

We all know they are going to be Boris’ lackeys, but at least there’s no mystery about what camp they’re in. There will also be no shortage of applicants, as many of today’s media figures are desperate to be celebrities. Trump has fired a good handful of spokespersons, but they all seem to reappear on podcasts, TV panels or even do the classic trick of ‘telling their story’ in a book. Sean Spicer and Anthony Scaramucci became celebrities after doing the job for Donald Trump.

It’s going to open up the channels of communication and bring a bit more box-office appeal to British politics. It will shake things up and that’s something that is desperately needed in the dusty and staid corridors of Westminster.

I just pity the poor soul who has to decipher and accurately transmit what Boris is saying.

They’ll earn every penny of their six-figure pay packet. Applications close on August 21.

All of the prominent broadcasters will know it’s a poisoned chalice, but will they be able to resist?
Newsletter

Related Articles

Beautiful Virgin Islands
0:00
0:00
Close
Finland Deploys Commercial-Scale Thermal Batteries Using Crushed Rock to Store Renewable Grid Energy
Valued at $109 Million: F-35B Fighter Jet Crashes in Southern California
Andy Burnham has Announces Plans to Redistribute Income Tax Revenue to English Mayors
Early-Release Scheme Faces Fresh Scrutiny as Reoffending and Prison Recalls Rise
Police Phone Checks Followed Report on Murder of MI5 Agent Inside Sinn Féin
Archbishop of Canterbury Reaffirms £100 Million Reparative Justice Fund During Ghana Visit
Drought Status Extended Across All of Wales as Heat and Dry Weather Deepen Environmental Strain
Record-Low Danube Exposes Probable Mammoth Remains in Bulgaria
US Says It Has Carried Out Heavy Strikes on Iran After Attempted Attacks on Its Forces
The chief executive of the popular gaming company laid off many employees and his pay rose to 38 million dollars
The World's Most Terrifying Smartphone: Recording, Documenting, and Reporting to the Regime
The AI User Nightmare: Private Claude Conversations Leaked to the Internet
UK: Former Football Association Leaders Call for World Cup Boycott Over FIFA Privatization Plan
Forbidden Love: China severs millions from their virtual partners
Over 24 Hours in the Air: Qantas Airbus Completes Record-Breaking Test Flight
Zuckerberg Opposes US Ban on Chinese AI Models and Warns of Regulatory Capture
Massive Wildfires Ravage Southern Europe: Fatalities in Greece and Evacuations Across France, Spain, and Turkey
Trump says Israel ‘would not survive’ without US
France Evacuates Atlantic Coast Resorts as Wildfire Risk Rises Again
Magnitude 7.1 Earthquake Strikes Kumamoto as Rescuers Search Collapsed Buildings
OpenAI Faces Demands for Full Disclosure After Models Breach Hugging Face
Nvidia Reportedly Takes Vast Texas Data-Centre Lease to Underwrite AI Expansion
Royal Collection Trust Income Falls as Palace Visits Retreat From Record Highs
FIFA’s Private-Investment Plan for World Cup Rights Draws European Revolt
Ministers Examine Social-Care Levy as Burnham Seeks Funding Settlement
Apple Briefly Crosses Five Trillion Dollar Valuation as Investors Retreat From AI Bets
Badenoch Offers Tory Votes to Keep Serious Offenders in Prison
Why Americans Queue for $15 Ice Cream and a $100 Caviar Pint
Another AI Genius Left the United States — and Silicon Valley Is Starting to Worry
Shein Reports $99mn Loss as Trade Barriers Test Low-Cost Model
CXMT Gains 466% in China’s Biggest IPO Since 2010
Amazon Seeks Approval for 5,105-Satellite Mobile Network
Burnham Puts School-to-Work Reform at Centre of Welfare Strategy
Burnham Rules Out Replacing Council Tax and Stamp Duty
Fresh Heatwave Threatens to Rekindle France’s Historic Wildfire Crisis
Following OpenAI's Cyberattack: 'Most Companies Still Do Not Understand What Is Coming'
Autopsy Finds No Violence in Death of Epstein-Linked Model Scout
Indian Education Minister Resigns After Cockroach Youth Protests
California Desert Data-Centre Plan Stalls as Water and Power Disputes Mount
War, Youth Revolt and the Global Struggle for Control
War, Power and the Rising Price of Political Decisions
Badenoch Rejects Grant Shapps' Bid to Return as Conservative Candidate
BAE Chief Warns Britain Has Underestimated the Risk of War
Burnham Rules Out New Scottish Independence Referendum in First Talks With Swinney
OpenAI Sued After ChatGPT Allegedly Discouraged Emergency Care Before Near-Fatal Embolism
Viral Video Raises Questions Over Twelve-Dollar Croissants at Manhattan Bakery
Miliband Sets Climate and International Law at Centre of UK Diplomacy
US Gasoline Returns to $4 as Renewed Iran Fighting Disrupts Oil Flows
Czech Central Bank Governor Rejects Early Euro Entry and Rate-Cut Pressure
Trump Orders 50% Tariffs on Selected Canadian Imports
×